The History of

What Without 

How or Why

First crocuses,

asparagus by the railway tracks,

rain on one side of the house,

birch eyes,

wet abandoned webs,

long lost faces in dreams,

an emphasis on the psychological in a b&w film,

colorful Indian mandalas,

the realization that a particular thought or way of thinking is harmful,

people out in the world not staring at their cell phone,

the yearning to create something,

love of beauty for beauty’s sake,

a monster’s loneliness,

basil,

things that will never come again,

poems that write themselves,

adult vulnerability,

how my cat taps her tail across the keyboard,

a rainy day after a week of relentless sun,

the sound of crickets on the 41st floor of a high-rise,

a smell that takes me into the past,

accordion jazz,

not wishing things as they are were different,

a nap that revives,

not knowing what I’ll say or write next,

memories of summers on Isle au Haut,

every snow that ever fell,

moving my furniture around,

wondering how I will die 

and where my energy will go without me.

Peter Valentyne

August 13th, 2019